He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
