Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
