it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
