Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
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