Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
