you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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