just come out here and I will go home with you...
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
