Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I am naked and annoyed.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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