Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
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i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
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It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
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