is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
