So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize