come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
she smelled like a LAN party
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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