Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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