people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
