office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
