I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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