Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Randomize
