When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
