Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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