remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Randomize
