Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
