There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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