I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
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