just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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