Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
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I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.