I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
