operation have a gay friend backfired
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize