Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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