If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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