I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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