it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
We have so much sex to catch up on
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
