I just pynch a tree in the face
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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