I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
