Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
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