You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Pappa wants mamma naked
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize