using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Rumble strips road head = magical
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Randomize
