I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
