this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Will exercising make me less horny?
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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