You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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