Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
