I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
