I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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