I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Do you remember whose house we're in?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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