Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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