I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize