Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
