Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
