okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Randomize
