One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
