Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
