How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
