"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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