The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Two words: blizzard sex
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
