she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
